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HEY GUYS. (Pretend I’m saying this with attitude, perhaps with a snappy hand gesture or two.)

So I know it’s been 6 months and all since I last wrote. And I could be all apologetic and whiny, but honestly, I hate reading those posts. And I could tell you in detail what I HAVE been doing while I’ve NOT been blogging but it all boils down to: I moved from Colorado to Virginia. From an apartment to a house. From no backyard to a garden-friendly one. And I think I might have even convinced Brad to let us get a dog to go with our picket fence (which is not white, but whatever, that’s just details.)

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I still squee when I look at my new house. It’s so sweet it practically gives me diabetes.

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The kitchen. Looks a little white to start with, but I’m painting it a bright, bright green. ‘Cause that’s how I roll.

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The backyard, where Dad and my brother and I have already installed four raised garden beds. I’m getting topsoil and compost delivered later this week, and have already bought some seeds and garlic to plant this fall, even though I know I’ll only get to grow some quick-maturing leafy greens with what’s left of the season. Having never grown anything before (not a single potted plant, people) I am slightly terrified that I’m going to find out I have the brownest thumb ever. But, I figure I can probably grow zucchini and summer squash pretty easily. And if we end up with 4 raised beds’ worth of zucchini each summer and that’s it, well at least I will have a lot of zucchini bread, right?

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There’s been lots of cooking going on in the new house, although I’ve fallen back on some of the old favorites rather than trying many new ones. But after what seems like the LONGEST SUMMER EVER, what with the hot Colorado sun and then the stifling Virginia heat, I’m so desperate for fall I’m about to rent a snow machine and spray paint my trees yellow. I’m pushing the fall season like Wal-mart pushes Halloween candy in August, and making butternut squash lasagna and roasted potatoes instead of hanging onto the last few days of summer with marinated tomato salads and such.

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I found this recipe on that time-suck-to-which-no-other-compares, Pinterest. It was so pretty I just HAD to try it. I added a pinch of paprika for extra flavor, but next time (and there WILL be a next time) I’m thinking of infusing the butter with roasted garlic first. The shallot just wasn’t enough for me in this instance, although the texture of the dish was SPOT FREAKING ON. Extra crisp top and smooth creamy slices of potato that fall apart on the plate. A dish made perfect with those last potatoes of the summer, especially on the first cold night of fall. (Or so I would imagine, considering it’s still 75 degrees here at night.)

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Crispy Potato Roast

Adapted from Martha Stewart
Serves 6

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Martha says there’s only 25 minutes of prep time for this recipe. Martha is full of lies. (But it’s totally worth it.)

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Gather:
3 tablespoons butter, melted
3 tablespoons olive oil
4 pounds potatoes, peeled
4 shallots, thinly sliced
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon crushed red pepper
a pinch paprika
a few springs of thyme, and

a mandoline or a sharp knife

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Prepare:
Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Slice the potatoes on thinnest setting of a mandoline or as thin as you can with a knife. (The thinner the potatoes, the crispier they will bake up.) You can prevent them from browning by putting them in a bowl of water as you slice.

Combine the butter and olive oil in a small bowl. Brush the olive oil mixture on the inside of a cast iron skillet or other heavy baking dish. Arrange the potato slices in the skillet as you like. Wedge slices of shallot between slices of potato. Sprinkle with salt, crushed red pepper, and a pinch of paprika. Bake for 75 minutes. Arrange a few sprigs of thyme on top of the potatoes and bake for another 35 minutes, or until the potatoes are crispy on top. Serve.

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Fitz & the Tantrums / Don’t Gotta Work It Out

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Since I’ve been cooking for myself, I’ve been pretty healthy in what I consume on a daily basis. And then I started this blog, and I started to learn about sustainable food production, eating organically, and the importance of eating local when you can. On average, I consume a whole lot more beans and lentils and whole grains during the week than I do pork, chicken, or beef.

But even though I’m usually bathing in whole grains and leafy greens and vats of golden olive oil, I do have a soft spot for some processed foods. Most notably, candy. I have a bad habit of eating candy while I read books at night. (Most recently, it was those damn pretzel M&Ms and Cassandra Clare’s new tome.) Of course, you don’t see much of that as my readers, because I’ve never thought that “pick up a bag of candy and eat with wild abandon” really counted as a “recipe” worthy of posting on this blog.

So for the new year (I’m talking about 2011, I know no one talks about New Years resolutions past… January 3rd) I decided to give up processed foods entirely. My “rules” stemmed mostly from Michael Pollan’s book “Food Rules.” Some of the rules that stuck with me were:

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Eat nothing your grandmother wouldn’t recognize as food.

Eat nothing with unrecognizable ingredients.

If it came from a plant, eat it; if it was made in a plant, don’t.

Eat only foods that will eventually rot.

Eat only junk food that you prepare yourself.

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Pollan has many other mind-blowing bits of info in the book, well worth the $6.00 I spent on my copy at the used bookstore. These were just my favorites.

To clarify, we still eat out on Friday nights. Even though my grandmother probably wouldn’t recognize my carnitas tacos with spicy poblano pesto, and I only have faith in Illegal Pete’s (but no proof) that they’re not putting high fructose corn syrup and MSG in my meal. And I’m sure the organic all-purpose flour I buy at the grocery store is made in a plant, but hopefully one day we can switch to a stone-milled version, if it’s not too expensive. We still eat desserts, but now I make all of them rather than buying them from the store.

I would be lying if I maintained that this didn’t have at least something to do with wanting to lose a little bit of weight. For those who don’t know me in person (all 2 of you reading this), you probably think I’m some svelte blond hottie, right? Well, sorry to ruin your dreams, but… I’m brunette.

Although I’m also trying to be healthier with what I stuff my face with currently (you know, before I revert back to subsisting entirely off of chocolate-dipped shortbread for all meals), my decision to cut out as much processed food as I can is born from a lot of reasons, most of which boil down to: I put a lot of work into not using commercial chemicals in my house, whether it be in my shampoo, or in my laundry detergent. And of course, there’s the aforementioned diet of mostly whole grains and hearty vegetables. So if I’ve been through all those fights, why wouldn’t I want to finish the battle?

This doesn’t mean anything is changing on the blog, of course. I still cook the same way with the same type of recipes. But it was on my mind today, so I thought I’d share.

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The Radio Dept – On Your Side

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For the past two weeks or so, I’ve been having exactly this for breakfast – a bowl of plain yogurt with blood orange segments on top. I’ve been using homemade yogurt, which is super thick like I like it. After I segment the oranges, I like to squeeze the leftover membranes over top of the bowl, to get all the extra juice into my yogurt. It’s like a customized blood-orange-flavored yogurt, minus the horrible sugary taste you get with commercial yogurts. So, so tasty.

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And then there was the day that I ran out of blood oranges… so I used some frozen berries left over from last summer. I microwaved them for 30 seconds on half-power, and let all the juices mix in with the yogurt. Definitely the best way to start the day.

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The Love Language / Brittany’s Back

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You want to know what is REALLY hard to make look delicious?

That would be, a bowl of this here soup.

I mean, it’s freaking tasty stuff, this soup, but it will definitely be filed under the category of what I like to call, ugly food. Don’t get me wrong, ugly food is almost always tasty – we’ve been over this before – it’s just that you’re going to have to convince your guests/spouse/disbelieving children of that fact before they’ll even sit down to the table. I tried to be all Ina-like and add “a garnish that reflects the flavors present in the dish” – that’s why the rosemary spring is just hanging out over there on the left – because honestly, brown soup is just a wee bit unappetizing.

Okay, so we’ve been over the basics of why you probably WON’T want to try this soup. But this is a food blog, so its not like I’m going to post horrible recipes. So let’s go over the reasons why you should try this, non?

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1. It’s a recipe from Ina Garten, whose every recipe is a foodgasm in the making, and who is only second to God in our foodie world next to Martha Stewart. (But is actually first in God’s eyes because Ina hasn’t been to jail. Go Ina.)

2. It’s made with all natural ingredients like chicken stock and white beans, so you know it’s good for you without tasting like cardboard.

3. This is a perfect dish for winter, since it uses just about the only thing “in season” in Colorado – dried beans.

4. The end product is creamy without being heavy, flavorful without being full of fat. The best of both worlds.

5. The ugly factor of food is inversely related to how delicious the food is. So this dish is obviously off the charts. (Obviously.)

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So, now that I’ve thoroughly convinced you, Law & Order-style, get thee to your grocery store/farmers market/pantry some cannellini beans.

And make sure to distract your children/spouse/guests with cartoons/sports/booze before you serve this.

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Rosemary White Bean Soup

Adapted from Ina Garten
Serves 6

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The only “adaptations” included reducing the amount of olive oil (because she alway uses a ton, bless her heart) and removing all references to “good” ingredients that will make you feel inferior.

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Gather:
1 pound dried white cannellini beans
4 cups sliced sweet yellow onions
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 large branch fresh rosemary
6 cups chicken stock
1 bay leaf
kosher salt, to taste
fresh cracked pepper, to taste

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Prepare:
Pick through the beans to remove any pebbles or other debris. In a large bowl, cover beans with at least 2 inches of cold water. Let soak overnight or at least 8 hours. Drain.

In a large stockpot, saute the onions with the olive oil until translucent, 10 to 15 minutes. (Note: Instead of adding more olive oil, just add a bit of water if the onions start to burn. And if you do burn the onions, just tell your guests it’s “Caramelized Onion White Bean Soup.”) Add the garlic and cook for 3 minutes until fragrant. Add the drained white beans, rosemary, chicken stock, and bay leaf. Cover; bring to a boil, and simmer 30 to 40 minutes, until the beans are soft. Remove rosemary and bay leaf.  Pass the soup through the coarsest blade of a food mill, or puree half of the soup in a blender/food processor. Continue pureeing and mixing until you reach a consistency you like. (I prefer a course puree.) Return the soup to the pot, and reheat. Add salt and pepper to taste. Serve hot.

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Best Coast / The End

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I made these for the first time a few weeks ago, when I just had some white and orange sweet potatoes hanging out in my house, leftover from the fall produce sales. They were starting their own mini sweet-potato-reproducing-factory in my cabinet, and I needed to get rid of them. Naturally, I decided to make some fries. It’s the default thing to do with leftover sweet potatoes, right?

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But you can’t just serve fries on their own… and for me, ketchup/catsup/catchup isn’t what you serve with a big platter of sweet potato fries. Sweet potato fries are the sophisticated older sister of regular fries. You need something to woo her with…

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Like intense garlic breath, of course.

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Thus, roasted garlic aioli. An aioli is much like mayonnaise… except hopefully homemade, and with a fancier name.

Honestly, you probably just want to invite all your friends over for these fries. You want to make sure all the people you know are eating this, lest you see a friend or five out and about later… because they won’t want to be within 10 feet of you. (Unless that’s what you’re going for… in which case, I applaud you for your creative strategy.)

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Sweet Potato Fries

From the Kitchenette
Serves 8 as an appetizer or side

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Gather:
4 sweet potatoes, orange or white or both, scrubbed clean
1 tablespoon olive oil, plus more if needed
coarse salt
fresh cracked pepper

Prepare:
Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Cut sweet potatoes into 1/2 inch sticks. (Note: I’m not too concerned about getting each fry the perfect length or width. Perfection is BORING. Plus, having some fries be more crispy than others is quite tasty, honestly.) Toss sweet potatoes with 1 tablespoon olive oil, salt and pepper, adding more oil until fries are just barely coated. Roast at 425 degrees for approximately 40-50 minutes, tossing each 15 minutes or so.

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Roasted Garlic Aioli

From the Kitchenette
Yields about 3/4 cup

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Gather:
1 head garlic
1/2 cup plus 1 tablespoon olive oil, divided
1 egg
salt
fresh cracked pepper

Prepare:
To roast the garlic, preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cut the top off the head of garlic, and place on a square of aluminum foil. Drizzle 1 tablespoon olive oil over top the head. Wrap the aluminum foil around the garlic, and roast at 350 degrees for about 30 minutes, until garlic is translucent and soft inside.

To make aioli, put 3 cloves of roasted garlic (you can squeeze them out of the head with your thumb) in a food processor or blender. Add in the egg, a pinch each of salt and pepper, and turn on the food processor/blender to high. Add in the olive oil in a VERY slow stream, as slowly as possible. Check the texture of the aioli intermittently while adding the olive oil; you are looking for a texture akin to a thin mayonnaise, and you may not need all the oil, or you may need a bit more. Once the appropriate texture is reached, transfer to a serving dish.

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Warpaint / Undertow

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So I actually meant to post these in time for Christmas, but as you probably remember, I went home to Virginia

and accidentally disappeared off the face of the earth for approximately 30 days.

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As you can probably tell, the red ball is covered in chopped dried cranberries. It’s filled with delicious mango chutney and shredded cheddar, along with some other delicious things. The green one is covered in chopped parsley, and is filled with heavenly, creamy goat cheese and scallions. (If you start drooling, I won’t say anything. I’m totally drooling just writing this.)

These cheese balls are a staple at any of our family gatherings. My cousin Grayson, and my brother Jeff, have been known to request them at Thanksgiving and Christmas. But I see no reason you can’t serve them for Superbowl Sunday… or even just a Tuesday afternoon. I mean, honestly… who can resist a cheese ball???

In fact, if you are able to resist a cheese ball, then I’m unsure you have a soul.

And I’m positive we can’t be friends. It’s just a requirement to friendship.

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This is another Martha Stewart recipe, because I swear, that bitch can do no wrong. (I tried a banana bread recipe from her the other day, and I swear I saw angels with the first bite. Damn her and her perfect, perfect recipes.)

Martha suggests serving the parsley-goat cheese ball with slices of cucumber, but clearly that’s for people who are trying to ignore the fact that they are eating a large ball made entirely of dairy fat. Own it, and serve it with water crackers.

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Base for Cheese Balls

Adapted from Martha Stewart
Makes one 4-inch ball

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Gather:
3 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
1 8-oz package cream cheese, softened
2 teaspoons lemon juice
scant 1/4 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
2 dashes hot sauce
pinch salt
pinch white pepper

Prepare:
Mix all ingredients in a bowl until smooth and combined.  Proceed with variation chosen below. (Base may be multiplied if making more than 1 variation; just divide evenly between separate bowls before proceeding.)

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Cranberry-Cheddar Cheese Ball

Adapted from Martha Stewart
Makes one 4-inch ball

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Gather:
1 recipe Cheese Ball base, above
8 ounces sharp cheddar cheese, grated
2 tablespoons mango chutney (or other complimentary flavor)
3/4 cup finely chopped cranberries

Prepare:
Combine the cheese ball base, cheddar, and mango chutney, and stir until thoroughly mixed. Pull out a sheet of cling wrap and lay on flat surface. Shape cheese into a ball, and wrap in cling wrap. Chill in fridge 1 hour.

Scatter chopped cranberries on a cutting board or other flat surface. Unwrap cheese ball from cling wrap and lightly press into cranberries, until dried fruit clings to surface. (Cheese ball can be prepared up to 24 hours in advance. Refrigerate, and let sit at room temperature approximately 1 hour before serving.)

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Scallion-Chevre Cheese Ball

Adapted from Martha Stewart
Makes one 4-inch ball

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Gather:
1 recipe Cheese Ball base, above
8 ounces goat cheese, softened
2 tablespoons scallions, finely chopped
1/3 cup curly parsley, finely chopped

Prepare:
Combine the cheese ball base, goat cheese, and scallions, and stir until thoroughly mixed. Pull out a sheet of cling wrap and lay on flat surface. Shape cheese into a ball, and wrap in cling wrap. Chill in fridge 1 hour.

Scatter chopped parsley on a cutting board or other flat surface. Unwrap cheese ball from cling wrap and lightly press into parsley, until herb clings to surface. (Cheese ball base can be prepared up to 24 hours in advance. Do not roll in parsley more than an hour or two before serving; the parsley will wilt in the fridge. Let cheese ball sit at room temperature about 1 hour prior to serving.)

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So yeah.

That was sort of an unexpected month off from blogging. I fell into a black hole of sorts.

Mostly unintentional. I had grand plans of blogging everything I made in my mother’s kitchen, delightful round-up post on my trips to visit friends, random posts of my family and friends.

But those damn family and friends. THEY SUCK ME IN. I pretty much reveled in their presence for a good 3 weeks, almost forgetting I even had a life in Denver, much less a blog about food.

We did make some pretty delicious food, my mother and I, some of which I’ll make again just to post here (it was that good). And then I’ll show you the FREAKING AMAZING homemade sausage that Brad, Amy and Nathan (my sister-in-law and brother-in-law) and I made from Ruhlman’s Charcuterie. (It was in.sane. That’s all I can say.)

In the meantime, here is what a black hole of family and friends looks like…

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I’ve got a few things to share with you, so get excited for some new recipes soon!

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Not to echo the sentiment of those who have written their December Can Jam posts already, but doesn’t it seem like just yesterday that we were all marmalading? This was the first year that I canned ANYTHING, and I think it was quite successful so far. I’ve learned so much, it’s almost laughable. The first time I made blood orange marmalade, I had no idea at which point to stop cooking it, and I was almost positive I would mess something up, get botulism, and die. But by March and April, I was feeling fine, feeling like I finally understood what to do and how to do it. Even now, I still learn things here and there (like the fact that your lids shouldn’t soften in boiling water, but rather in “just simmering” water) but over all, I think I understand how the process works. I’ve even explained to people (a few times) how pectin works! But I know from now on that canning will part of my life for a long, LONG time. I’m looking forward to handing out my handmade goodies to my family members this year at Christmas!

I’ll do a round-up of my Can Jam recipes tomorrow possibly, but we have guests this weekend and I just wanted to squeeze this in before the deadline!

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Habenero Hot Pepper Jelly

Adapted from Ball Complete Book of Home Preserving
Yields 3  8-oz jars

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Gather:
1/3 cup finely sliced dried apricots
3/4 cup white vinegar
1/4 cup finely diced red onion
1/4 cup finely diced red bell pepper
1/4 finely diced habenero pepper
3 cups granulated sugar
1 pouch (3 oz / 85 mL) liquid pectin

Prepare:
Combine apricots and vinegar, let stand for 4 hours or overnight.

Prepare canner, jars and lids.

Add red onion, bell pepper, habenero, and sugar to apricots. Bring to a rolling boil over high heat, a boil that cannot be stirred down. Add pectin and stir to combine. Boil hard, stirring constantly, for 1 minute. Skim off foam and pour into hot jars, leaving 1/4 inch headspace. Wipe rim, center lid on jar, and screw band down until finger tight. Boil in a water bath for 10 minutes. Remove jars and let cool.

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Our first batch of Pecan Brown Ale was a success! It’s in its last stage of fermentation, in the bottle. We can’t drink it for another 2 weeks, but we tasted it when we bottled it on Saturday, and it was delicious! Not bitter at all, the taste of pecans lingering in the background. Plus, it’s freaking DARK, darker than a stout almost. But delicious, none the less, even when it’s not carbonated!

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On another note, you might have noticed that I’ve been blogging quite frequently during the month of November. It’s because I personally challenged myself to complete NaBloPoMo, which stands for National Blog Posting Month. It’s a month-long challenge in which you blog every day. And I finished! I blogged every day for the entire month of November. (Are you impressed? I was.) I didn’t say anything about it on the blog… I guess just in case I bit the big one and forget halfway through the month. I did it for a lot of reasons… because I wanted to make sure I still liked this whole blogging thing after 18 months (I do) and I wanted to develop my voice (I think I did) and mostly, I just wanted to see if I could do it. (I could!) Anyways, I hope you didn’t get tired of my constant babble! I’ll be back either tomorrow or the day after (I might give myself a day off, haha) with the final stage of home brewing!

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Royal Wood / On Top of Your Love

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Last time, we left off at the beginning of the primary fermentation stage, as part of our great saga of home brewing our first batch of pecan brown ale.

The big push of activity, or at least the things that must be done in a very precise manner, all comes at the beginning of the home brewing process, i.e., EVERYTHING that we talked about last post. The transition from primary to secondary fermentation is quite painless, actually. Which is great, because you can excuse yourself from a whole night of doing chores/laundry/your tax return, etc., on the basis of transitioning your beer betwixt the first and second ferments…

And instead just watch an episode of Vampire Diaries or two. Preferably while drinking wine. (It’s a great system, beer brewing.)

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(My Best – But Probably Not Very Good – Explanation of) How to Home Brew, Part Deux:

After you move your cooled, yeasted wort to a sterilized plastic tub for the primary fermentation, the wort will remain in the primary fermentation stage for about 5 days. This can be longer, or shorter, depending on a number of factors, namely, how much sugar there is to be digested by the yeast and how fast the yeast is able to digest the sugar.

The air lock will tell you whether the yeast is active or not. A few hours after you seal up the wort, the air lock will begin bubbling as the yeast begins to break down the sugar into alcohol and carbon dioxide. The bubbles, obviously, are the carbon dioxide being released out of the wort. The flow of bubbles will be fast, for about two days, slowing down to nothing as the beer marks its third or fourth day of fermentation. Wait for the bubbles to die down completely, then wait one MORE day after that before you move to the secondary fermentation. Capiche?

On the day you intend to move to the secondary fermentation stage, sterilize the siphon, clear tubing, and the carboy (the large glass container above) or a second food-grade plastic tub with a diluted hot water/bleach solution.

Attach the siphon to the clear plastic tubing, and direct the other end of the tubing into the carboy (or second food-grade tub). Start the siphon by either pulling up on the interior tube (if it’s an automatic siphon) or sucking on the tubing to start the flow (if it’s a manual siphon).

The only important thing to remember when siphoning from the primary fermentation vessel to the secondary fermentation vessel, is to avoid sucking up any of the sediment that has formed on the bottom of the plastic tub. Essentially, you will sacrifice about an inch of your beer that is sitting in the primary fermentation vessel.

I really had no idea why there was even a secondary fermentation at all, honestly, until I googled it. According to homebrewing.com, a second fermentation isn’t actually necessary, although it’s preferred by most home brewers since the beer isn’t filtered before bottling, like commercial beer. If, after you taste the beer post-secondary-fermentation, the beer tastes too much like yeast, then you can even send it through a third fermentation period. With each additional fermentation, the dead yeast (and other sediment left over from the breakdown of grain and malt) will settle in the bottom of the vessel, which will yield you a much more clear looking and purer tasting beer.

So, after all but the last inch or two of beer has been siphoned into your secondary fermentation vessel, either top the vessel with an airlock or, for a carboy, a simple layer of saran wrap, held fast with a rubber band or two. The yeast won’t have as much sugar left to convert into alcohol in the secondary fermentation (most of it was converted during the primary stage) so there will probably be less carbon dioxide build up in the secondary fermentation vessel. Still, if you are using saran wrap, check it every day or so to make sure the carbon dioxide buildup hasn’t busted open the plastic wrap – even though bacteria can’t live in alcoholic environments, we are still aiming for a clean fermentation vessel.

Next post – the final step… bottling the beer!

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James Pants / Darlin’

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What I Do

(Usually) simple, (frequently) tasty, (generally) slow-food-based recipes served with a hearty dose of snark.

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